Finding My Flow in the Depths of Soul Sucking Self Promotion

Here I was again. In a book store, standing beside the table that I had fussed over – making sure that everything was in just the right place. I stood up tall, facing the less than spectacular crowd, and tried to ignore the feeling of doubt washing through me. Thoughts speared my brain. This is stupid. No one wants my book. What am I doing here?

We’ve all been there. Maybe you have done a book signing, maybe you haven’t. I am sure, however, that you have all had similar thoughts and feelings in some situation.

A book signing is honestly one of the hardest things that I’ve ever done. It is soul sucking. There you are, like some kind of jack-ass, telling people as they walk by that they need to buy your book. Yes, I am a local, self-published author that decided to write a book because I had this deep, burning desire within me to tell at story, and you now, some random stranger who was just going about your day, you need my book. It will change your life.

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Celebrate You

It is absolutely 100% a-okay to celebrate the S!$T out of something you did that you are very happy about.

And, as I am telling you this, I will admit that I just re-learned this lesson again a few days ago. I know – to truly celebrate you can be hard.

I worked for two years writing and producing my first novel. It is infused with things that I am passionate about. 80s heavy metal. Serial killers. Detectives and criminal profiling. And wilderness.

For an entire week leading up to the 80s Heavy Metal Party / Book Launch that I had planned, I was seeping self-doubt and dripping with a feeling that I was a self-indulgent m!#er f%&er. Yes. But – I have a tool box now for when I have these feelings. I rid myself of negative thoughts and replaced them with positive and exciting ones. And I worked on my energy – I tapped into that inner glow, that inner WHAM BAM that people see in me. I let it swell within in, a growing ball of powerful punch, until it was ready for the PARTAY! Thus, I put myself out there now to show you that it is totally OK for you to celebrate you!!!

When the launch day came, I eased into it. All my hard work and planning was done. Everything was in place. I let go. I allowed myself to truly enjoy and be in every moment. And guess what? I celebrated like an 80s rock star!!!

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